Hi!

Thankyou for your deep sharing.

I became a mother a bit more than a year ago, and I think I identify with what you’re saying about loving another person so much that you would do anything for them. I think it is a good thing to love another person selflessly, because, after all, that’s what God did for us—loved us so much that He sacrificed Jesus on the cross. It is good to be thinking for the good of another person so much that you neglect your own privleges.

However God would never ask us to give up our own salvation for another person. Paul wanted to do it but he knew he couldn’t. (Romans 9:3) So that’s not a question of our choice.

Jesus calls us to love Him more than anyone or anything in our lives. Examples include:

Matthew 10:37 “Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.”

Deuteronomy 6:5 “Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.”

Do you love this person too much? Well, I can think of one test to see if you do.

Who are you willing to follow? If this person asks you to do something that may come between you and God, would you do it? Would you be willing to risk the relationship with this person in order to follow your conscience and God? If you are then you do not love them “too much”. But if you can’t then you are in danger of saying that this person is more important to me than Jesus and that ultimately is the essence of sin and rebellion against God. And no matter how noble and good the reason, such action is hateful to God and puts your salvation at risk. It is better at this point to trust God and follow him. After all God is the one who is in charge of this person’s life. He knows what is best for this person, and doesn’t need our input in their lives to make them whole. God can look after them without our help.

There was a friend who once said that she would pray to God to take away anything that she can’t live without, because she knows that it has become her idol if she can’t live without it. I pray that my love for my daughter would never become so selfish that I can’t live without her. I pray that I can love her selflessly because God loves me, and that my love for her will be part of my love for God, never taking away from it.

I pray the same for your love for those around you as well, that the way you love would be a testimony of God’s love for you!